There comes a moment somewhere in our forties or fifties when you realise you’re carrying far more than your body, mind, or spirit ever signed up for Not just shopping bags and family logistics, but invisible baggage. Regrets, “should haves,” unspoken guilt, the weight of keeping everyone else afloat can all become a bit too much to bear.

Perimenopause and menopause seem to have a knack for shining a bright light into all those dusty corners. Your hormones may be up the wall and continually shifting, but so is everything else. I don't know about you but I am feeling a profound change in my identity, priorities, patience, especially tolerance for nonsense.

Suddenly, things that once felt manageable now feel suffocating, and things that once mattered… just don’t.

Perimenopause and menopause don’t just change our hormones, they change our energy patterns. Many women describe feeling more inward, more reflective, like their body and mind are quietly saying, “It’s time to stop managing everything and start releasing what isn’t yours anymore.”

But emotional clutter, guilt, resentment, perfectionism, regret, blocks that natural shift. It keeps the nervous system stuck in “high alert.” And when your hormones are already playing hopscotch, that tension makes everything feel worse. Sleep, mood, digestion, patience, all of it.

It’s as though your body and soul are both saying, “We’re full. It’s time to make space.”

That’s where emotional decluttering comes in. And no, it doesn’t mean going off to a silent retreat, burning sage while wearing linen (although that sounds awesome and is definitely on my manifestation list). This is about 10 minute, real world, quick but powerful rituals. Simple acts that help you loosen your grip on what’s heavy and let in a bit of light again.

🌿 Why Midlife is the perfect time to let go

There’s something quietly rebellious about letting go in midlife. For years, many of us held everything together and a lot of us still are. The house, the family, the job, the invisible emotional glue that keeps the world spinning. But at some point, you realise you’re more glue than person.

Perimenopause often brings clarity in disguise. As the body transitions, so does the mind. You may find yourself re-evaluating friendships, work, and old versions of yourself. You're not “losing it”, you're "shedding it". You’re molting, like a snake, except with more herbal tea and reading glasses.

Letting go is spiritual, but it also practical soul-work. You are still busy and life is still making demands of you but you fell the need to create space for calm, peace, and truth. It’s about remembering who you were before you were everyone else’s everything.

So, in the spirit of busyness, and just trying to reclaim those moments of peace which may have previously been a natural part of your life, Here are 10 ten-minute practices that can help you do exactly that.

✨ 1. The “Release on Paper” Ritual

Grab a notebook or scrap paper, whatever you have, no need for anything fancy. Write down whatever’s sitting heavily on your heart. Think guilt, anger, old stories you tell yourself. I bet you can think of a million things immediately. I know I can, and I seem to come up with something new every time I do this ritual. Don’t overthink it, just let the pen move.

Then, tear it up, shred it, or (safely) burn it in a bowl. You can chose one thing, or make a whole list, it's entirely up to you.

Then say out loud “This no longer needs to live in me.”

This small act sends a powerful message to your subconscious, that you’re ready to make space for something new and the weight of those things you have written down will now lift.

This is a practice you can repeat daily, or weekly, or one a month, whatever you feel you would like to do. It sounds small but it is very pwerful.

🌬️ 2. Exhale the Weight

Close your eyes. Inhale deeply through your nose for four counts, hold for two, exhale slowly from you mouth for six.

Each exhale is a gentle act of release. Like emptying drawers in your mind. Imagine exhaling people’s expectations, the need to please, the inner critic that never shuts up.

It’s not just breathing, it’s editing your emotional energy in real time.

This is a practice you can use intentionally and quietly any time. If you are feeling overwhelm or that wonderful perimenopausal anxiety, then try this. It activates the parasympathetic nervous system and calms you, and at the same time you intentionally release anything you feel is weighing you down.

🪶 3. The Gratitude Flip

Write down three things you’ve been clinging to. Maybe resentment, regret, or worry about something.

Now, next to each one, write the lesson it taught you or how it helped you grow. This doesnt need to be pages and pages, just the first thought that comes to you. Again, don't over think it. For example:

• Resentment towards my boss → taught me boundaries.

• Guilt about time for myself → reminded me I’m worth rest.

This simple reframe abd really help turn emotional clutter on its head. Everyone has those feelings about a person or situation that they just can seem to shake. Try this practice next time you find your thoughts spiralling over one particular issue and see how light you begin to feel.

🧺 4. Declutter one small space, intentionally

Choose a drawer, handbag, or bedside table. If your bedside table is anything like mine, with magnesium tablets, progesterone tablets, a calming lavendar candle, book, and variety fo random lotions and potions then that choice is an easy one!

As you clear it, say quietly, “I’m making room for peace.” When you first say things like this out loud, you might feel silly, If someone is around, dont worry, you can whisper or even say it in your head. It is the intention that matters and the physical act of clearing mess away.

Physical clutter mirrors emotional clutter, both drain energy and attention.The goal isn’t a perfect home, it’s a lighter head.

Sometimes, the act of letting go of old lipsticks or random chargers becomes a small spiritual awakening. (Also, why do we all have so many pens that don’t work?)

🚶‍♀️ 5. The mini grounding walk

Step outside. The garden, park, even your street. Walk slowly and feel your feet on the ground. With each step, say silently: “I’m releasing what no longer serves me.” Then: “I’m arriving where I am now.”

Feel yourself connecting with the earth and stating the intention that you are in the moment. This little ritual is great first thing in the morning. If you are lucky enough to have a patch of grass to stand on then do this in bare feet if you can. It pulls you back into the here and now and stops your mind spiralling with all the clutter and to do lists swirling around in there.

Midlife menopausal clarity comes from presence, not perfection. This practice pulls you out of your head and back into your body and you will feel calmer for it.

💗 6. The Forgiveness Whisper

Think of someone (or yourself) you still hold tension toward.

Close your eyes and breathe out a quiet, “I forgive you. I release this story.”

You don’t have to feel saintly, it’s about intention, not instant healing. Forgiveness here isn’t approval for something someone has done, it’s freedom for you and a lightening of the load. Forgiveness lightens you. It’s choosing not to carry the heavy stuff anymore and allows space to bring in more peace together with people and experiences that bring you joy. You may not feel forgiveness immediately, and there will definitely be resistance, but the more you practice this the more you will losen your grip on it and feel at ease.

🚿 7. Shower Away the Day

This is one that you have probably heard before, but works like magic. When you shower, imagine the water washing away anything that’s clinging. Old negative thoughts, other people’s moods, exhaustion. Watch it swirl down the drain and disappear.

I used to worry that I was draining all my negativity into the earth, but once it is there is it neutralised and no longer exists as negative energy. I imagine it as physical mud on my body and imagine it being losened and being washed away until the water runs clear.

Finish with one slow, deep breath and a small thank you to your body for getting you this far.

A shower can be one of the simplest, most sacred forms of self-renewal, and one you can easily incorporate into a daily practice. If you are a bath person, you can visualise and intend the same as you take the plug out and the water goes down the drain.

✍️ 8. Rewrite the Story

We all carry old labels. They come from a lifetime of experiences and we seem to attach even more to ourselves through the menopausal journey.

“The responsible one,” “the fixer,” “the one who never finishes things.” or “I’m too sensitive,” “I never get it right.”

Now think of a personal label you’ve carried

Now rewrite it in a kinder more truthful way. For example

“I have a kind heart and it’s okay to protect it.” or  “I’ve carried a lot, and I’m learning to share the load.”

These tiny rewrites retrain your inner dialogue. It's like a spiritual spring clean and emotional edit for the subconscious. Every rewrite frees up a little more space inside you. You can then start to fill those spaces with more positive affirmations and I will do a deeper dive into that in a future blog.

🕊️ 9. The emotional reset stretch

Stand tall. Inhale and raise your arms to the sky. Exhale and drop them down, shaking out your hands, shoulders, and legs.

Let out a small sound, a sigh, hum, or gentle “haaa.” I know what your're thinking, it's just weird. I agree. It does feel odd, and you probably shouldn't do it in the middle of the office or supermarket, as you could get very strange looks, but it works. Animals literally shake after danger, we don’t.

So for ten minutes, stand up, loosen your shoulders, and shake, arms, hands, hips and legs.

You’ll feel ridiculous for thirty seconds and incredible after three minutes.

You’re literally shaking off tension.The body stores emotion, so moving helps you release it. You can do this whilst listening to your favourite, feel good music if that feels less strange but getting moving and stretching, even a little bit can shift negative emotions in a very pwerful way.

💌 10. A kindness note to yourself

Write a short letter to your younger self.

Thank her for what she carried, what she survived, what she learned. Forgive her mistakes. Tell her she can rest now and that you will take things from here. This isn’t sentimental, or fluffy, it’s integrating your previous self and acknowleding everything she has been through, allowing that to rest and starting with this wiser new individual. This is emotional housekeeping with love at the centre. I love this practice because although you may feel like your world is upside down and you are achking and sweating and forgetful, it focusses your mind on your younger self and you can look and see how far you ahve come and how much you have learned. Be kind to all the versions of you, especially the version you are living now. You’re effectively gathering all versions of you into the same room and saying, “We made it.”

🌸 The Afterglow of Letting Go

Letting go doesn’t mean having everything figured out or becoming someone new. It means choosing clarity over clutter, peace over perfection. You don’t have to fix your life, it just starts to feel lighter if you just make enough space for it to breathe again. When you start releasing even a little emotional clutter, you’ll notice subtle shifts:

• Your thoughts feel clearer.

• You care less about what drains you.

• You begin responding instead of reacting.

• You find moments of unexpected calm in the middle of chaos.

  And perhaps most importantly, you start trusting yourself again.

As women, we’ve spent decades collecting memories, relationships, responsibilities, even identities. But midlife isn’t a crisis. It’s a clearing. And in that clearing, the woman you really are finally has room to exhale.

So tonight, maybe tear up a note, take that deep breath, or let the hot water rinse away a story that’s past its sell-by date. Ten minutes at a time, you create space for peace to move in. Because the magic of midlife, menopause and all that comes with it, isn’t about adding more, it’s about finally letting go.